The beginning of another week

No news yet. I am sitting here at work with knots in my stomach. I am trying to deal as best I can but the stress level I am feeling is just really high. I sent out about 10 resumes over the weekend again. I just have to keep moving on until something comes up.

There is a mediation on one of my cases this morning at 10:30 and Rick hasnt even looked at the book yet! I truly hate this job.................. I would so much rather being at home with my baby girl. Actually, I'd rather be anywhere than here.

Another Interview

The interview I had last night went ok but I am really not sure about it. I think they are looking for someone with a full 4 year degree. (sigh) guess its back to the classifieds this weekend...........................

I am doing my best to stay positive. Unfortunately when I want something I tend to want it like NOW. That is why this situation is so hard for me. I am being forced to wait and work somewhere I despise. If it wasnt for the fact that we have 2 car payments I would be a SAHM for a while! A girl can dream can't she?

Before I got married that was always my dream. I wanted to stay at home with the kids until they started school.....boy was I a dreamer!

I am miserable

I was so happy when I found this new job. I was finally out of that bankruptcy crap and now working my own cases in divorce accounting. Well I have been doing this for 2 months and I totally despise it! My boss is a real jerk and he bitches whenever anyone is out sick.

So needless to say I am looking for a job again, and NOONE wants to hire me. I am so qualified and have great experience but its as if that isnt enough. I have been on 3 interviews in the last month. The first one I totally wanted. I was so excited about it and really thought I nailed it. They called me saying it was between me and the other person, and they chose the other person.

Last night I had another interview and I really like their benefits and its right up my alley. Well they are interviewing other people this week so I will either know by tomorrow or not for 2 weeks aack! I am sure I didnt get that one either. Tonight I have an interview with a CPA firm so we will see how that one goes.

I am desperate. I dont want to work here another day. I know I am blessed that I have a job, but its making me physically ill. Im gonna wind up taking the first job that comes along just to get out of here!

Im just so depressed all the time. I feel like my life is completely out of control and I don't know how to get it under control. I have been praying alot about this and as of yet no answers. I am sure they will come in time.

I really wish we could afford for me to stay at home with Lexi. It would solve all of my problems. But the only way that would happen is if we sold the townhouse and one of the cars, and moved into a small apartment. I dont know if it would be worth it to do that. We have a lot of equity in the house where we could pay off both cars, but that would be it. Why does life have to be so complicated?